Two more days, both backward and forward. Two days unlogged and two days to go. I’ve been thinking about savasana in preparation for when I lead a group through (in[to]? beyond? against?) it tomorrow morning. Today, I closed my eyes and spoke out loud in empty space to practice being less frenetic. On the train, I wrote things down in ink: ‘You are not defined by your thoughts,’ ‘bring your attention to the bones in your skeleton,’ ‘draw your attention to the space between your thoughts,’ etc. The caesura, the caesura, the caesura. I can’t help but think this all is not exactly what I mean.
But I don’t know what is, yet.
One piece of savasana-related advice that’s stuck with me over time actually comes from Daniella. That piece of advice is: choose stillness. Last winter, I took a trip during which I went climbing with a friend. That night, in bed, I found myself unable to sleep: all I could think about — visualize clearly — was my body climbing up the wall. Choose stillness: I remember repeating this phrase to myself over and over again until I fell asleep, unable to distinguish between my waking mind and haze.
When you feel something in sleep, do you feel the thing you feel in waking life? For example, if I close my eyes and sleep and feel a palm resting over mine, does that palm exist, or is it a sensation in my mind?
It was also in the winter that I began to visualize asana poses in my sleep.
When I sleep, I don’t know anything. Recently, I pictured myself flying an airplane. Then I pictured an apocalypse. My friend, my twin brain, was there. We were holding hands. We were walking toward it. ‘That means you love and trust her,’ JJ said. Which is true.
Speaking of love, I’ve been thinking about it. More on that soon. In the meantime, this blog will be ending in a couple of weeks, but before things wrap-up, stay tuned for reflections on and interviews with three marvelous yoga teachers: Ross Gay, Angela Arnold, and the aforementioned Daniella Rosales-Friedman.